Relationships, love and monogamy

I never considered myself capable of monogamy. My life has always been a revolving door of relationships, lovers and brief encounters. A made me realize this week, in one of our conversations, that I have never been alone. Not only have I never been alone, I have never been faithful to my boyfriends, my husband or exclusive to my lovers. Until now. 

A has never considered himself monogamous either. He has always cheated on his wife and has never been exclusive to one lover. He admitted to me that he used to take pleasure in making women ''his project''. He once seduced a happily-married aquaintance who had kept herself a virgin until her wedding day, just to see if he could. Of course he could. Even during his longest affair, in which he was reasonably satisfied, there were others. Many others. There are no others now, no profile on AM and even our curiosity and willingness to experiment with a threesome and swinging has been pushed aside. Not because we are no longer curious or excited about it, but because right now, we are so completely consumed and satisfied by one another that the thought of being with someone else is no longer exciting. 

A came over yesterday in the late afternoon and we took a long bath together and shared stories of our past. Stories that we tell no one for fear of judgement. Stories of adultery, sex with strangers and emotional games that we have been known to play in the past. As he spoke, he softly brushed my skin with his fingers, leaving goosebumps over my arms. He cupped by breast and squeezed my nipple which made me gasp. When his hand reached my inner thigh, I was already dripping wet with arousal. A does that to me. Just by touching my skin, so softly, he makes me wetter than anyone has ever made me. His moans and his excitement when he realizes that my arousal has dripped down my inner thigh only excites me further. A kissed me passionately and led me to the bedroom. As he layed down on the bed, I got on top of him and kissed him hard. I sucked on his bottom lip and he moaned softly. I moved my mouth to his neck, kissing him as I moved lower. I traced kisses all along his chest until I reached his cock. I softly kissed him and licked him as he closed his eyes and let out a small sigh. A is normally a little reserved when it comes to explicitly tell me what he wants sexually except when my mouth is on his cock. When I am pleasuring him, he will grab my head and push himself deep down my throat and tell me how good it feels. He will say over and over how spoiled he is and how no one can please him as I do. I love that. I love making him moan and scream with pleasure. When we finished and A collapsed, spent, on my bed, I grabbed his hand and guided him to my wetness. I was dripping wet. I looked at him and asked him to feel how wet it made me to make him cum. He closed his eyes and played with me while saying how this was the most amazing sex he had ever had.

I always thought that I was incapable of being satisfied with one man. That was a fact that I thought to be completely true about myself. A is making me question who I am, who I have always thought I was .... Could I be monogamous with the right man?